yes, it’s a huge commitment

Day 33

Revel is restless tonight, running a low fever. Nothing serious, teething maybe, but he wants to be held by his mama even while he sleeps.

It makes writing this challenging, and frustrating.

“That’s the problem.” Wil said, “with writing everyday. It’s a huge commitment.”

And then we looked at each other like, duh, and said “but that’s the point isn’t it?”

Yes it is a huge commitment writing everyday. Yes it is hard to find the time. Yes it means that I’m usually up until 1 or 2 in the morning after a long day of mothering, and taking care, and loving, and living.

Yes it is a huge commitment living in mourning everyday, thinking about what we’re losing, letting myself finally be heartbroken over all of it. My temper is short at times, and sometimes I’m insanely sad.

Yes it is a huge commitment standing in solidarity with the others who are fighting. Finding who and what I stand with, writing to them, spending time with them, learning about them, fighting with them.

And yes, it is a huge commitment finding ways to rebel each day, living in a tiny house, growing food in our garden, learning the Old Ways skills, finding ways to rage against and tear down the culture of destruction we’re locked in.

Yes, it is difficult, and unprecedented, to need to find a way to separate from the culture we were born into.

Yes all of this is a huge commitment. But that’s the point.

That no matter how tough, and uncomfortable, and frustrating, and unfamiliar this all might be,

And maybe BECAUSE this is tough, and uncomfortable, and frustrating, and unfamiliar,

my resolve grows stronger each day.

I am finding my voice, finding my legs, finding my courage.

I will do whatever it takes.

And that, oh  that, makes my heart incredibly happy.

Thank you for listening,



Our guest post tonight is from Wilson, my amazing husband you hear so much about, fellow activist, and teacher. He designed a  patch for “The Year of Black Clothing: in mourning, in solidarity, in rebellion” movement.

Like the cut on the back of a motorcycle jacket, or the flag of a nation,

a clear and recognizable logo can help to identify and unify a group of people.

If this project resonates with you, and you want to show your support,

or you’re participating in the movement yourself, by wearing black, by mourning, by standing in solidarity, and by rebelling,

We invite you to print out this design, iron it onto an old shirt, and make your own patch out of it.

Pin it to your sleeve, over your heart, on your jeans, or to the front of your bag.

Mourn, stand, rebel.

“Ancient legends say that mourning doves are prophets bringing messages of wisdom to humankind: Mourn what has passed but awaken to the promise of the future.”       

-Julia Hughes Jones

rebel logo

The mourning dove is a close relative of the late Passenger Pigeon.


2 responses to “yes, it’s a huge commitment

  1. Nice work, team.
    This image is lovely, elegant, and striking.
    Love to you all.

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